If you have an issue, you're stuck with your life or you simply want to find a lazyman's way to get that rat out of your prepackaged meal, you can ask me for advice.
Having been a councellor for countless years, I can then display my *coughs* expertise *coughs* in the more vital fields of life.
So if you have issues, matters or a crate of beer, bring them up!
Of course, like Dr. Phil I will also tend to infinitely ramble on about weight loss. If that happens just slam me with a metal pipe
